What would you girls do if you find out that your boyfriend talks to a woman that is married (that is not the problem) and they have know each other for about 4 years or so... she was married at the time they met each other, they were neightbors actually and he knows her husband as well of course, now the important part is that she calls my boyfriend when her husband is out of town sometimes, and her husband asked her before not to talk to my boyfriend why???? I dont know... but anyway behind her husband's back she still calls him... so I think that it is not right that he doesn't know that they talk becuase once he finds out then the least thing he could think is that there is something between then and that is why she hides it!

Now I really need to know what do you guys think about this?? Do you think that he should still talk to her?? DO you think that there is no problem for them to talk IF her husband is aware of it?? or what???

Am I crazy

GO WITH YOUR GUT. WHAT IS IT TELLING YOU? IN MY EYES YOU ARE BEING PLAYED. THAT IS MY OPINION. OH I FORGOT YOU ARE NOT CRAZY.

I would definatly confront him with your suspisions and look him right in the face and if he really swears that nothing is going on and you still don't belive him goto this womans husband and ask him what kind of past there might be. I'd rather be safe than sorry the same sort of thing happened to me during my first marriage and he lied and he couldn't hide it anymore because her husband called me. so I wish you luck keep me posted I hope everything goes ok for you!

It could be paranoia...both from her husband and from you.

It is possible that they are good friends.

My best friend is a guy...and his wife has no problem with me calling him (sometimes at weird hours) becuase I NEED to talk to my best friend.

I think that if he says its nothing, it would be easier for everyone involved if you just believed him. Is there something going on in your relationship that would make you feel so insecure?

I dont think I am being paranoic, if they are just good friends why her husband can't know about them talking??? That is my point if there is nothing wrong why does she hide it from him?? Besides this her husband already asked her not to talk to him why?? there must be a reason why!!

I cant go to her husband, that would get me in trouble with my boyfriend, and I wouldn't do that, I wouldn't like to bring this problem into their marriage, however I need to protect my relationship, I dont feel that I am being played but it really bothers me the fact that she hides it, she calls when her husband is away, what is that suppose to mean??? My boyf. thinks that I a m trying to choose his friends, what is she the only friend in the planet?? He has some other female friends and I dont mind because I can tell they are just friend but not this one... I hate this situation I just made it so easy for him I said that they can be friends still with only one condition, that her husband knows about it! I dont even want to imagine what would happen if her husband finds out, my boyf. will be in trouble, her -not my business- and my relationship will be who knows where... thanks for your advice and keep helping, it is really healthy to talk about stuff that actually is constantly on your mind and share and get some advice from other people.

OR..her husband could be a jealous control freak...and thats why they are hiding...

Who knows? Only he can tell you the truth about whats going on, or you could just jump to conclusions....guess thats up to you.

i think if hes being open with you about it then i think your just worrying id do the same thing in your situation but if he is going over there when her husband is out of town then id put a stop on that in a quickness but for the most part if she calls does she talk to you at all or directly ask for your boyfriend i dont know my best advise to you is honesty is the best policy take that however youd like good luck

Obviously this has already become a problem in their relationship if her husband asked her not to speak to your boyfriend-its obvious he knows something has happened or might happen if he is concerned enough to ask her that. I agree, you need to talk to the husband ask him if there was a 'past' to them & why he feels this way. If you are afraid of him leaving, dont be, if he gets mad at you for being concerned then he's upset you got smart &/or he got caught! Your instincts are telling you something. Turn the shoe around, think about how your boyfriend would feel or do if it was you & a male friend. I can bet he wouldnt sit around & worry about it, He'd assume, He'd ask everyone he could, He'd shut the friendship down &/or he'd leave. You can have oppisite sex friends but when the spouses get concerned its time to find out why. If her husband is a control freak that would only make the hiding more dangerous & maybe thats what the "friend" likes about it & that your boyfriend plays right into her palm. If thats the case you need to be careful, she'll be the one who's mad because you spoiled it. My husband says something wrong with your boyfriend thinking its ok to hide the 'so-called' friendship.

Put your foot down or out the door! Talk about disrespect! If he thinks this is OK, its over!