Jeff, on the off chance that you may read this, I want to express my deepest sympathy to you for the loss of your father. Watching tonights show was very hard for me as the situation was all too familliar. I am 34 years old, my father was born in 44. I lost him to Small Cell Lung Cancer last year. I am so glad that you made the descision to go home "early" to be with your dad, and that you had the opportunity to spend time with him in his final days. In my fathers case, the end came much quicker than any of us anticipated and I live with regrets about the things I wish I could have said. I realize that this might not be much consolation to you in the grand scheme of things. I dont know you or your father but Discovery's presentation makes me assume that you were close to him, as I was to my father. Hang in there man, time does heal, although maybe not as fast as we would like it to. Great job on the show and best of luck in your future endeavors.
So glad Jeff made the right choice, I visited my father three weeks prior to his sudden death at 87, so glad I did the visit or I would kick myself for the rest of my life. Must say Jeff just impresses me so much with his creation in his diary (a must see) and the thoughtful note he left in his cabin. What a class act.
Absolutely the right call by Jeff speaking from a similar personal experience. Esp with 11 days left to go they proved they would have made it even though of the four groups they were provided with the most meager resources.
I don't understand why the guy went on this trip to start with. If his dad was seriously ill to the point of going terminal at any time, it takes a remarkably selfish personality to take off on a months-long wilderness caper just for a chance to be on TV. And if he had "dealt with it" prior to leaving and had reached an understanding with himself and his family that he would not return if the news was bad, why jump at the first chance to jet on out of there? Just because the situation got a bit tough at the camp? The guy is a hypocrite.
I don't think we should judge Jeff in any way. We weren't given many details. Maybe his father insisted he go on the trip. Can you imagine how hard it is for a parent to have your child watch you sick and suffering? The heart of a parent is so amazing. Like when his dad really wanted to see him for Christmas, but as a parent he would probably never directly ask the child to come home. Also, Jeff probably grew so much during the experiment that he thought of so many more things to share with his dad. My point is, we can't judge how someone deals with one of the hardest things he will ever go through. Please, please keep in mind that he and all volunteers probably read this board and act like you're talking with them in the room. It's OK to have an opinion, but just like in the "real world" it's not always OK to share it.
Amy, in the discussion on camera, we heard that Jeff's father wanted him to go, and stay for the whole three months. That might have been a father's wish for his son to experience new things and grow. With that growth, as you pointed out, the circumstances changed. Jeff had a beneficial learning experience, and he was still able to return home in time to share his father's last days. I lost both of my parents early, and I would not take away from the days I spent with my mother, near the end. Jeff will have less reason to second-guess himself now. His experience in Alaska ended well.
Mefolkes, so true. I always find myself feeling defensive of the volunteers, my character is to always defend and support others, while some people always need to rip people down (like some of our fellow posters). I was moved that Jeff and his family were even willing to talk about this on camera, and to allow the camera crew in the hospital during a very poignant reunion. For Jeff to share that with all of us, it's not right for people to then judge him. I was just very offended that someone criticized Jeff for going in the first place, then insinuated he wanted an excuse to come home early. They only had 11 days left, and they had done amazing things in their time there. I believe they could have more then survived 11 more days, and like they had said, what more did they have to prove? I'm sure he hasn't regretted it for a moment.
So it was Jeff's father's wish that Jeff go and stay the whole 3 months, but Jeffie can't handle the heat (or the cold) and runs home at the first opportunity? Yeah, a great way to honor your father's wish.
Look, we all have to die. There is nothing we can do about that. But we can make an effort to live our lives honorably. Based on what I have seen, I am not prepared to give this guy any breaks. If you make a commitment to your father, your partner, your family, and the show, you suck it up and finish it. Being "just" eleven days short of finishing this commitment is like being "just" eleven days short of earning your college degree - after all, what more could they have taught you in those 11 days, right?
I think some of you judging Jeff and Elizabeth under the circumstances WE were made aware of is very unfair. Yes we know some of the circumstances of Jeff's decision to go in the first place and to return early. What we really do not know is as Paul Harvey used to say.. the rest of the story.
They had eleven days left to the end of the experiment. They still had plenty of food if they watched their eating, they had firewood, they had made the worst lodging (IMO) into a comfortable home. What did they have left to prove other then they could sleep in the tent eleven more days.
On the other hand while the decision to leave was not an easy one I am sure, you need to take into consideration Jeff's immediate family. And I am not talking just his father. The emotional stress at times like this is tremendous. His mother and father both I am sure were a strong factor in their decision. Also it was apparent they appreciated his decision to return.
Perhaps some of you are right, maybe they should not have attempted this experiemnt with the home front the way it was. But maybe they did the experiment knowing that if a true emergency came up, a satellite phone would put them in contact and they could get out of the experiment.
My best wishes to Jeff and his family. Great job there Jeff and Elizabeth. I was cheering for you the whole time.
How to live one's life honorably? Who shall decide? Was it a great decision to go knowing that your father could die while in the Alaskan wilderness? Probably not. However, I would categorize it as a calculated gamble given the circumstances known at the time of departure. And as we all know, his calculation was pretty accurate. Once the decision is made, you grab that once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, put everything you have into it, making sure you do not leave (early or not) without leaving it all on the "field"? Honorable? I believe that is up to Jeffie and his family to decide.
What are the facts?: 1) Jeff's father was not terminal when he left. He was doing well. 2) Jeff's father did not take a turn for the worse until Thanksgiving. 3) Jeff's mother called him home at the best possible moment. His father was still coherent and able to express to his family and friends those things a dying man needs to express. Had Jeff waited 11 days, he would have been greeted with the senseless expressions that the dying bless us with in their final days in this world. 4) Jeff's father would not approve of Jeff staying back and passing on this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Joe Frederick was too proud for that. With his blessing, we all rooted for Jeff and prayed like crazy that he made it home in time for the end. It all worked out. 5) The last month of Joe Frederick's life was filled with his family and friends by his side. It was filled with plenty of laughter and tears, hugging and talking, eating and drinking and drinking and drinking. Had that 11 days been missed, it would fill a lifetime with regret. And drinking.
Does Jeffie deserve any breaks? As his older brother, he doesn't get any breaks from me. However, those 11 days meant a lot to the Frederick family. We were fortunate to say goodbye to our father the way we did - thanks to that 11 days. Honorable? Frederick.
On behalf of the family, I thank you all for your condolences. It has been tough on all of us reliving this, but very nice to see our Dad again. Thank you also to Ricochet for doing an outstanding job of showing our Dad with dignity in the last episode.
Wow, I am glad some of the posters here are so perfect...never made a mistake or an error in judgement. My heartfelt sympathies go out to Jeff and his family for the loss of his dad. As far as I can see, Jeff has nothing to be apologetic or regretful of.
Jeff, if you ever take time to read these blogs you have my most sincere condolences. You made the right decision to go back early and spend the time you could with your father. You only have one father and the time you had together was limited. Alaska will always be there for you to return to. You and Elisabeth did great with the meager accomidations you were provided with and I wish the two of you all the best for the future.
