I completely agree. I cannot believe that women are basically being encouraged to put their children in daycare so they can pursue their personal interests. Sorry, when you have kids you take on the responsibility of raising them - not paying someone else to do it. Very selfish premise for a show.

I completely understand single moms (or others) that have to work, but these moms are choosing careers over their families. How sad.

I will not watch this show.

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(And to those who think you can't go back? You can...if you keep your mind, your looks and your skills up. )

And what about the moms that never had the skills or the LOOKS (spoken like someone in a looks driven industry) to begin with? What about them?
I have a great mind but no degree and was never that good looking, even in my younger days. What do you suggest for me?
I was fine with everyone tearing each other apart but this one sent me over the edge. I'm glad you are fulfilled by being your child's teacher. I have a mom who could have never done that. Should she have had three girls, probably not but she was trying to fulfill society's expectations of her some 40 odd years ago. So I should look down on her, I think not.
All of you spouting your holier than thou views need to take a step back and ask yourself if you are passing along this rigid view of good and bad to your own children.
And before you scream at me, remember, I'm a stay at home mom too.

I can't believe that this show actually has a following. I refused to watch it from day one, and then decided that I must see at least one episode to have an informed opinion. It really made me sick! To stay at home is already a full time position, I don't need anyone telling me or my family different. I am well educated, well travelled and very much informed, and I have learned through life that the happiest families are the ones that the mom's are at home loving their children. It angers me that there are women out there that feel that they need to see "what else" they could have done with their lives. They should have thought of that before they said "I do". Somehow I wouldn't be so irritated if it was a show about people in general who felt that they missed their calling in life, but to put Mothers in that position is gross. We all know what the Hostess of show felt she could have done better in life...Maybe they should have hired her for a "don't drink and Drive" ad. And I wonder is she really happy for women who decide to stay at home? Howcould she be? She's out trying to keep up with the Jones'. I sincerely like the TLC but I will not be watching it any time soon.

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Originally posted by joanna1:
I can't believe that this show actually has a following. I refused to watch it from day one, and then decided that I must see at least one episode to have an informed opinion. It really made me sick! To stay at home is already a full time position, I don't need anyone telling me or my family different. I am well educated, well travelled and very much informed, and I have learned through life that the happiest families are the ones that the mom's are at home loving their children. It angers me that there are women out there that feel that they need to see "what else" they could have done with their lives. They should have thought of that before they said "I do". Somehow I wouldn't be so irritated if it was a show about people in general who felt that they missed their calling in life, but to put Mothers in that position is gross. We all know what the Hostess of show felt she could have done better in life...Maybe they should have hired her for a "don't drink and Drive" ad. And I wonder is she really happy for women who decide to stay at home? Howcould she be? She's out trying to keep up with the Jones'. I sincerely like the TLC but I will not be watching it any time soon.

Just because you are incapable of being happy for someone who makes a different choice from you doesn't mean others can't be. It's pretty easy once you realize that the world is not comprised solely of people who think, feel and act exactly as you do and learn to respect choices that others make.

What are all you SAHMs going to do if twenty years from now one of your daughters decides to be a WOHM? Disown her? Sue for custody of her children? Scream at TLC for planting the seeds of discontent via this horrible, offensive television show?

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Originally posted by nunimonster:
What world do you live in Its2008???? There is no such thing as being a good mom by working full time. Can you be a mom to your kids while you are at work?...

well miss high & mighty nunimonster, walk a mile in someone else's shoe and get back to me. I am a great mom, but I have to work outside the home. I work hard for my kids everyday, and they are healthy, well adjusted youngsters who are well rounded, athletic, involved and intelligent kids that I am proud of. BTW, my mom had to work outside the home as well, and that was 30 years ago - I don't have one bitter bone in my body against her that my siblings and I may have had to go to the sitters after school back then. Get off your high horse, and don't even go the route of 'exceptions to the rule' I don't consider myself that even though I have no choice in my life right now than to work outside the home. just because someone stays home with their kids, it doesn't make them a good mom

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Originally posted by joanna1:
IIt angers me that there are women out there that feel that they need to see "what else" they could have done with their lives. They should have thought of that before they said "I do"..

So now you can't even have a career or the desire if you get MARRIED?! What is going on with the rabid SAHMs? Please have a little tolerance.

quote:

We all know what the Hostess of show felt she could have done better in life...Maybe they should have hired her for a "don't drink and Drive" ad. And I wonder is she really happy for women who decide to stay at home? Howcould she be? She's out trying to keep up with the Jones'. I sincerely like the TLC but I will not be watching it any time soon.

And now you've decided to personally attack Tracey Gold. How do you know she's trying to stay up with the Jones? She has a career she can work for a few weeks and be off for months. This is a horrible choice for anyone as well? If you think she doesn't pay every day for that DUI, I think you are very wrong.

I have never in my life considered myself a feminist but some of you are sure painting my tolerance of other's choices that way.

Yes, I agree there are VERY BAD working moms who ignore their kids. There are also VERY BAD Stay at home moms who ignore their kids for volunteer and charity work or the TV or the internet or the bottle of booze they care about more.

Back off the venom.

AMEN SISTA! I could not have said it better myself!

All I have to say, is that I'm 24. I'm single and I live on my own with my own fantastic career. I plan on hopefully one day on meeting the right guy and doing the whole marriage and family thing. However, I come from a strong line of women and I also intend on being a full time mom along with a full time career woman. My mom raised three children on her own while working overnight shift as a nurse. Even after she married my stepfather she worked. I do not harbor feelings against my mother at all for this. She made every attempt to be at our school functions. For each one of us. Now that's 3 different schedules. She was wonderwoman I hope that I can be just as wonderful of a mom that she is. We can have it all, and I'll demand to have it all.
It's great that some women can be SAHM's. But I'm not one of them. I get stir crazy as it is. And cooking and cleaning is not what I signed up for in my life because I was born a female. Maybe 60 years ago, but not now. I will always work. I will always support my child/children in what they do. I will always put my child first when that does happen in my life. However, I have to earn a living as well in order for ME to feel complete. I'm entitled to be a career woman just as much another is entitled to be a SAHM or SAHW. Every woman has a choice to be what she wants to be. We should be greatful that we have these choices. Way back when, our only place was in the kitchen and as mothers. Take advantage of what opportunities you have. And DON'T frown down upon others who choose to do the opposite of what you do. That's what this country needs to start doing. Stop pushing agendas. Learn to accept that everyone is an individual and has individual needs and wants. As long as those needs and wants are not hurting anyone...what does it matter?!

Just my two cents....and FYI...I LOVE THIS SHOW

Okay, I didn't see the show but wish I would have. I've been on both sides of the equation. I stayed home until I no longer could (financially or mentally) then slowly reentered the workforce. I currently work at a child care center in a toddler room. I may not be the parent to these kids but I love them and care for them like I would my own kids. I don't think I've ever met a provider that didn't feel the same. Please stop bashing day care and those of us that provide these services.

I totally love this show. There are SO many women out there who really aren't 100% happy being home with their kids. Heck, almost all of my own friends wouldn't chose to stay home even if money were no issue. We just aren't all cut out/made to be at home moms.

BUT, I am totally one of those moms who is 100% happy being at home. Unfortunately I can't afford to not work, so I run a small home daycare. While I do like my job, it makes some aspects of caring for my family very difficult (getting to doctor appointments, attending daytime school events, etc) and if there was a show that did the opposite, I would SO sign up! If they came in and said "We are going to pay off your car and student loans so you can quit your job" I would literally pass out on the spot!

I realize that with this post I stand the chance of a plethora of women showing up on my doorstep looking to tie me up and burn me on the stake, but I have to say something. First of all, I am a man. I am happily married and the father of a 16 month old girl. When my wife finished her FMLA, she went back to work full time, at a hospital where she works as a Radiation Therapist and make a little over $100k a year and yes, she has 2 degrees and just turned 32 this year. For the next 12 months, I took care of our daughter during the day and sometimes into the night due to the overloaded schedule at the hospital where my wife works for the patients treatments. I would get up a little over 2hrs before she woke up and went to the gym to work out, I would come home and change and take over the care of our daughter for anywhere from the next 8 to 12hrs sometimes. and of course I watched her on the weekends when my wife was on call or went to the gym for a few hour. I changed diapers, feed her, took her to appointments, played with her, watched her every minute of the day, for the next 12 months. Now, she is in daycare. I have to say honestly, that I did not find it that difficult at all. What is so hard about it?? She only started daycare in the last 3 weeks and is doing fine!! I don't see what all the fuss is about, it is not that hard to do.

It never ever crossed our minds that my wife would not go back to work after the birth of our child. You see she has career, not a McJob. And it is a demanding job and I have never thought for one moment that she was making a choice of her job over her child. Never crossed my mind nor anyone we know has ever said that. In fact, as a Radiation Therapist, about 80% of her co-workers are women and more than half of them are mother who work and I never hear them complain like this message board show. A bunch of whinners is what everyone sounds like.

Now, before I log off, I need to mention a few things. I am only 38 yrs old. I have a full time job and an office that I work from. I am a VP for a Fortune 50 company, we have over 400,000 FT employees around the world and have been in existence for over 100 years. We are one of the most recognized and well respected companies in the world...think along the lines of HP, GE, Siemens, etc. You get the idea. I make twice as much as my wife, and I am not in the client/customer service/sales area. I never took anytime off when she was born. I have a laptop, a blackberry and a VPN connection to work, so that is how I worked for several months. And when I needed to go into the office, guess what I did??? I got her dressed and took her into my office, where I had a playpen and all the items I needed to keep her comfortable. I never pawned her off on anyone to watch, I couldn't even if I wanted to as both our families live in other states over 1500 miles from us. When I had to travel for work, if my wife could not arrainge her schedule to take care of her, I took her with me on the trips. Never had a problem. I even took her overseas with her passport in hand, never an issue.

The point I am making is that I had my ducks in a row before I had my first child. I finshed my undergrad at 22, was ROTC and went into the service for 4 yrs. I then earned my master and my PhD by the time I was 31 working full time and supporting myself on my own. I was also married for 3 years before we got pregnant. I consider myself a hard worker and my job is in the engineering/architect area and very demanding and time consuming. Yet, I managed to do it for a year.

All this crap I am reading is just that, crap. Is being a full time parent as important as a full time job, YES, I agree. Is it harder?? Not in the least, get a gripe and be truthful to yourself. Work smarter not harder is my motto!!

This is the first time I have watched this show and I was disgusted!!! I cannot believe what our society has come to that we have a show that is taking a mother out of her home and her precious children so that she can go back to work! Our children are our legacy. It is one thing if a mom HAS to work to make ends meet. But children NEED their mothers, and I think any woman who chooses to put a career or monetary things above her family will regret it. Their childhood is irreplacable. Material things are not. Is it worth it? In my opinion NO.

Wow! I can't believe the amount of vicious talk on this board. I am a full-time career mom. My son goes to day care and he is not an unhappy kid. As a matter of fact, he is a great, well-rounded, educated, social child as a result. Contrastive to your close-minded comments, not all mothers who work are bad mothers. To the contrary, I believe that I am a better person and a better mom because I work outside the home. I spend more quality time (key note-quality time) with my child in a week than most spend in a month.

I think it's great for those who believe its their calling to be a stay-at-home mom. If that makes you happy than by all means continue to do what you do. But, don't be caviling, and cantankerous with your ideals to the point that you're looking down to those who oppose them. I take care of my child and fully intend to continue to support him, both emotionally and financially well past my retirement days. I don't expect anyone to have to pay for his wants, needs, college education, etc. Which is more than what I can say for most who are probably waiting on a scholarship to do so. For those who will feel the urge to type a nasty remark, don't. Go spend quality time with your child instead.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by merlinflex:
I applaud you for your courage in A. being a male and posting a comment on such ravening board as this, and B. being so forward and franc in your comments. I completely agree with your message. Both my husband and I are active duty military BY CHOICE. We are both college educated professionals currently pursuing MBAs all while raising a toddler. My husband took care of our son while I was deployed and did an outstanding job. My child was in NO WAY neglected, mistreated nor malnourished. I'm appalled by the amount of viciousness and bitterness on this board. I also agree in your comment that most people are bitter because they're not being true to themselves and instead pose as martyrs belittling everyone else's efforts. I can only imagine the type of children these close-minded individuals will raise. I hope that my child someday feels as proud of me for being a happy, loving, full-time working mom, just as I am of mine. BTW My mom too was a full-time working, independent and loving mom.

I've watched this show twice. Even though the second mom made the decision to stay home, I think that the basic premise of the show is a bad one. It takes people that have already made difficult decisions like giving up careers and losing one income to stay at home and raise kids and makes them go through that process all over again. I would probably be inclined to watch it if the producers only chose moms with school aged children.

I raised my daughter as a single parent from the time she was 5 until I met my husband 11 years ago. She is 20 now and has just moved out (today). I stayed at home with her until she started kindergarten. I currently work 4 days a week and my husband works from home. We have our 3 year old son in a two day program from 8 am - 2:00 pm. My husband and I are with him except for those 12 hours a week. I sometimes pick him up and take him back to work with me where he naps or my husband picks him up and brings him home. We are lucky. I obviously think it is important to stay at home until school starts, but that might not be for everybody.

My mom worked as a teacher the entire time I was growing up. We are still close and I know she was a good mother to me and my brother when we were little. She is an excellent grandmother to my children. She still works at the age of 68 and she and my dad (who will be 75 this year) baby sit when we need it. Family is important, but not all families are the same. We must work together as citizens and elected officials to improve the value of mothering AND fathering.

I think that if this society would place more concern for families into the every day business world, (on site day care, easier work schedules, job sharing)things would better. There's a really good website and organization called momsrising.org. It supports all mothers no matter their choice, which is what we should be doing. My mom and I are both good mothers, we just chose different ways to express our motherhood.

This show sabotages women who have already made a choice and creates a schism between women who choose different approaches to being a mother. I can't imagine being given the opportunity of a lifetime, deciding to take it or leave it, and having that decision on film for my kids to see. No one wins in that situation. I have no criticism for the families. They are merely taking advantage of an offer. TLC really needs to be a bit more concerned about what happens to these families after the show. This might be reality at it's lowest.