Ahhh...my Ink Man and Tat Boy fix. And just in time for a new episode day, as well.

Yay for the theme!

Oh, gonna sneeze...

**achtung**

That's better.

Gesundheit, dina.

*clapping* bravo my girl bravo!!lemmings hahahaha..oh you make my day!! plagiarism is not cool!! ahhh, that is sooo funny cuz i was out this weekend and i hears like 3 different peole say they wanted a tattoo just like nicole richie's rosary. you are great!!

Smarti - you've got such good manners.

I don't know which one I laughed harder at Smarti...your strip or Dina's sneeze! PERFECT fit I'd say....LMAO

Thank you!

Genuis!

Thank you Smarti for putting a smile on my face and for making me laugh today! I needed it.

quote:

Originally posted by ladytat2:
Yep, us Virgo's are great ppl.....

Got that right, ladies. Even though I am not a woman nor is my name Michelle, but I am a Virgo. Rock on.

Just a friendly reminder that I've been good at not bugging you about another issue of the famed "Inkman & Tatboy" Series but now I'm buggin'...its been FOREVER...come on Smarti...get with it!

Believe it or not, I've actually been writing for money recently! That and going on vacation.... Let me see what I can do....

No excuses....you've got Hawaiian Inspiration...LOL

OK smarti...I'm jonesing here. I need a fix quickly! If you don't write another issue soon, a whole lot of people are going to have to check into Inkman and Tatboy rehab. PLEASE help us....

Oh dear, I certainly don't want THAT on my conscience! Okay, okay, let me think....

manpris...

This one is all your fault, josie....

It is a busy lunch hour downtown on a sunny, warm day. People in business suits happily stroll from their office buildings, enjoying their lunches and chatting. Suddenly, a dark figure appears, swathed in a heavy fur coat.

He staggers up to an unsuspecting citizen, Gary, who stands in his sensible trousers, joking with his girlfriend, Tanya. Suddenly, the stranger takes a deep breath. He exhales a steaming, searing lungful onto the oblivious man’s pants.

The pants start to shrink! They slowly shorten several inches, until Gary’s heavily tattooed ankles are revealed. Tanya shrieks.

Tanya: Gary! Your legs!

Gary and Tanya gape helplessly as the stranger assaults three other business men with his fabric altering exhalations. All their beautifully crafted tattoos are exposed.

Gary: Good heavens! It’s Swelterbreath Hotpant!

Tanya: Swelterbreath Hotpant?

Gary: Yes. He used to be a humble tailor in his father’s humble dry-cleaning establishment, until a tragic accident left him with his horrendous slack shrinking talent!

The villain turns his menacing glare onto Gary.

Swelterbreath Hotpant: That’s right! And I’m going to expose all your tattoos so your corporate masters will have no choice but to fire you! Then, your jobs will be outsourced to China, and the entire economy will collapse! MWAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Tanya: Ink Man, help!

Suddenly, a high pitched whine, like the sound of a tattoo machine but ten times louder, splits the air. It’s the Ink Mobile! Ink Man and Tatboy spring out.

Gary: Thank goodness you’re here, Ink Man. Swelterbreath Hotpant shrank my trousers! While my employer is actually fairly liberal on the subject of body art, they do ask that I cover my tattoos while I’m meeting with clients as a representative of the company, and they did clearly state that policy when I accepted their job offer. But if I go to my afternoon meeting like this, I’ll be canned for sure!

Tatboy: Holy pedal pushers, Ink Man, he’s wearing manpris!

Ink Man: Manpris?

Tatboy: Well, you wouldn’t call them capris on a dude, would you?

Ink Man: Good point. Don’t worry, citizen, we’ll have this sorted out in no time.

Ink Man and Tatboy run down the block to where Swelterbreath Hotpant is assaulting yet another unsuspecting citizen.

Ink Man: Stop right there, Swelterbreath!

Swelterbreath Hotpant: Well, if it isn’t Yank Man and Gripboy! Go ahead, try and stop me!

Ink Man grabs the hose of a nearby fire engine. RINSE! SPIN! GENTLY TUMBLE!

It’s over in moments. Swelterbreath Hotpant lies vanquished, dripping wet and tied up in his own wire hanger.

Swelterbreath Hotpant: Curse you, Ink Man!

Tanya, Gary and the other pant-shrunken men approach.

Tanya: But Ink Man, what about Gary’s manpris?

Ink Man: Stand back, Miss. Gentlemen, brace yourselves.

He gently turns the fire hose onto the men, carefully wetting only their shortened trousers.

The pants start to expand! They lengthen to their previous hemlines. The men all gratefully breathe a sigh of relief.

Gary: Thank you, Ink Man! I don’t know what we would have done without you!

Ink Man: In truth, citizen, Swelterbreath Hotpant isn’t really much of a threat. He’s just full of hot air.

quote:

Originally posted by smarti22:
This one is all your fault, josie....

:::curtsy, curtsy:::

I will gladly take the credit for InkMan and TatBoy inspiration.

Hahahahahaha....loved it....you're too funny Smarti...who knew "Manpris" could be so much fun... you girls are too much!

I love them! Your a great story writer, keep up the good work.

Huh. I smell troll...and possible inspiration.

dina - not even gonna give him that much acknowledgment...

Good for you smarti! I have to agree with (was it?) fiesty on the dark side, it's prolly just my snotty little sneeze again.

Nope, wasn't me. I don't want to give our gloomy little pork chop any more attention than he deserves.

He's obviously having fun stirring the pot, and it doesn't bother me at all.

Not you, huh? I could have sworn someone over there said nega was probably achtung...

A humble woman sits gazing at a blinking cursor on her computer screen. She thoughtfully gazes into the distance.

smarti22: Hmmmmm… I haven’t done a new Ink Man and Tatboy episode recently. I wonder what I should have them do this time.

Suddenly, the door flings open. A darkly sinister man confidently strides in. His thuggery is thinly veiled by his Armani suit.

smarti22: Who are you? And what are you doing in my house?

Man: For shame, smarti. Don’t you recognize me? You created me, after all.

She scrutinizes him a moment. Then her eyes go wide. She gasps.

smarti22: Good heavens! You’re Judge Mental! Sinister leader of the Corporate Mind Set!

Judge Mental: Got it in one.

smarti22: But... but... I put you in jail!

Judge Mental: I’m fictional! You can change the paradigm to fit your immediate narrative needs. Don’t you remember Patrick Duffy on Dallas?

smarti22: Okay, but why would I possibly need you out of jail?

Judge Mental points to a massive stack of first year case books piled on the table.

Judge Mental: Have your even looked at your first Torts assignment?

She rolls her eyes.

smarti22: Ugh. Don’t remind me. I still have to brief that monster.

Judge Mental: I went to law school, remember. I know exactly what you’re up against. The cases only get more complicated.

smarti22: But, I’m going part time.

Judge Mental: Ah, yes, but you’re also working full time. And you have to cook for yourself, keep your house clean, and don’t forget laundry! Do you honestly think you’ll have time to devote to keeping Zincman and Bratboy alive?

smarti22: Good heavens! You’re right! What was I thinking? I’ll have a nervous breakdown! Ink Man, help!

Suddenly, a high pitched whine, like the sound of a tattoo machine but ten times louder, rises from the street. It’s the Ink Mobile! Ink Man and Tatboy rush in.

Ink Man: What’s the problem, citizen?

smarti22: Ink Man, thank goodness you’re here! Judge Mental has presented me with an insurmountable conundrum! I can’t possibly manage all the studying I need to do for law school and keep writing stories about you.

As she speaks, Tatboy wanders over to the table and picks up a case book.

Tatboy: Holy Rosetta Stone, smarti! You actually understand this stuff?

smarti22: Yeah, it’s a bit dense, but if you stick with it, it’s manageable.

Tatboy: Gosh, you are smart!

smarti22: Wow, thanks! I’m so flattered, I forgot I’m writing this myself! But, seriously, I won’t be able to keep up.

Ink Man steps forward and places a comforting arm on her shoulder.

Ink Man: Fret not, smarti. We are ever vigilant. Even if you aren’t reporting our exploits, Tatboy and I will keep fighting. Whenever someone passes judgment on a tattooed person, we’ll be there. Whenever someone gets nauseous during a tattoo, we’ll be there. Whenever the scourge of f@iry fatigue strikes, WE’LL BE THERE!

Judge Mental: My, my, my, how very Steinbeck of you.

Ink Man: As for you, Judge Mental, your next suit will be off the rack!

DEPOSE! CROSS-EXAMINE! ADJOURN!

It’s over in moments. Judge Mental lies vanquished on the floor, tied up with his own sock suspenders.

Judge Mental: Curse you, Ink Man!

smarti22: Thank you Ink Man! I don’t know what I would have done without you.

Ink Man: Just remember, smarti, we’re always with you, in your heart.

smarti22: Um... Listen... If you get the chance... do you think you might possibly find a way to leave Mr. Satisfaction with me for real?

Bravo, Smarti!

I'm so sad that this might be the end! Of course, if Ink Man ever drops Mr. Satisfaction off at