he says we always have sex in the same place same everythinggggggg how can i change this? how can i make our sex more interesting bside changing positions..
Hi. Wow does that sound familiar. This month I have been divorced for 1 year and I can say that at least in part, the same situation is partially to blame. My ex was an extremely controling type of person and our sex life was very predictable and almost scripted so to say. By the way she's a school teacher. LOL. Briefly, on her terms, we had sex every Saturday night at bedtime. (unless she was mad and punishing me by holding back) When we did have sex she would lay there like a zombie and say "ok, go ahead" It was my job to start and get her in the mood before she would actually move. Then we followed a sort of script (again by her insistence). We did this, we did that, we did the other thing, bing bang boom, good night. Needless to say it was not very enjoyable. I tried and tried to talk to her and even suggested counceling but she wouldn't have anything to do with it. I am happy to say that I am now in a relationship with a much more dynamic and passionate lover. You wouldn't believe the differance it makes in everyday life. I now realize what I was missing. I guess I could say my biggest advice would be to communicate (my ex refused) Have a very frank and open talk about what each of you would like to happen. Dont' be embarresed, this is an important part of a relationship. Admit to each other that there is a problem, then openly discus how to fix it. Such as, I would like it if you did this once in a while, or that every now and then. Or on the other hand, Gee honey when you do that it kind of turns me off. Be spontanious!!!! Sex doesn't always have to be a certain night at a certain time doing the same old thing. Wherever and whenever the urge hits you is fair game. (as long as you don't get arrested lol.) Connected to what I just wrote is the fact that both of you must want to have a more spontanious and dynamic sex life with each other. Make your partner want more. Take care of yourself physically, dress nicer or more provacative, saw sexy little things during the day to each other. In general make yourselves more availble to each other. If you really want to correct this it may require doing things you've never done before or might be a little uncomortable with. Think outside the box. For example, the next time he's out in the garage working on the car (or something)come up behind him and grab him (not too hard) ! This may sound a little extreme, but you get the picture. Hope this helps, keep us up to date.
This message has been edited. Last edited by: kim g,
