This has been a question I've been thinking about for the past couple of years. For me, I've been concerned about how I could balance my martial arts training with the life that I might have in the future. For now, it isn't so much a problem. I'm a graduate student in college, and am able to devote enough time to both scholastic and martial studies.
Still, I'm wondering what will happen when I have a regular job (which is a whole other situation in itself). I remember asking my own dad about that, and he told me something akin to this: You can study martial arts, but don't go to deep. "I practiced Tai Chi for some many yrs. I was even leading classes. But when I became a doctor, and had a family, those became the important things. I couldn't practice anymore. When you don't train for a month, a year, a decade, all those skills are just forgotten. So, don't go so far now, because in the end, it will just be a big waste."
I'm asking those who have been involved in the martial arts for so many yrs., that does it become an "either/or" situation? Or can a person have a successful job, a great family, and still devote themselves to the arts?
I have been struggling with this myself lately. My son and I started taking Tae-kwon Do back in April. Working as a software developer 40-50hrs/wk, sometimes I get 2-3 lessons a week, sometimes, it's just 1 and sometimes I miss an entire week.
I'm still trying to get the hang of regular practice. My strategy so far is to just keep trying and not give up. Any suggestions?
Its not easy to say the least. Part of the reason i was in education so long was because it allowed me the free time to continue training. I didnt set out to be a pro fighter. Like you i was a full-time student and thought i would get out and get a regular job after school, fighting at that point was just a hobby. When graduate school fell through i decided to give mma a shot and see what happened. Balancing a job and martial arts is not easy. I know a lot of pros that have to hold down a full-time job to pay the bills. Its all a matter of what sacrifices you are willing to make. For someone who wants to be a casual student i think its about seeing it as part of your personal time and setting aside a few hours a week for something you really enjoy.
I have been struggling with this myself lately. My son and I started taking Tae-kwon Do back in April. Working as a software developer 40-50hrs/wk, sometimes I get 2-3 lessons a week, sometimes, it's just 1 and sometimes I miss an entire week.
I think you're doing fine. The fact that you're making an effort to spend time w/ your son in addition to working hard for your family shows you're both a dedicated father and dilligent worker. When it comes to the martial art classes you are taking with you're son, I see it much in the same way as what Jimmy suggested: see it as part of your casual time and try to make time for it.
At the same time, if it comes to a point where you can't make the martial art classes anymore, I wouldn't hold it against you whatsoever. My dad was a doctor, and his entire life revolved around his practice. I understood this at a young age, and I think your son would understand as well that your job is a necessity, is needed for the well-being for the rest of the family, and that if the situation were different, you would definitely like to spend more time w/ him.
In a way, this relates to my original question. For all of us, we want to give a bit more of ourselves to the study of martial arts. However, when taken in consideration with the bills, the rent, the job, the kids, and other responsibilities in our lives, there will be some compromises, and as Jimmy said, the sacrifices you're willing to make. For me, as a full-time student who's life is very devoted to study, I'm even more casual than the casual practitioner. I can only squeeze in one day a week training with a master, while the rest of the week is spent training by myself. Thus, I admire those people, the MMA professionals who hold full-time jobs as well as others, who, though sacrificing, can get in a lot more than just one day a week of martial arts practice.
The discussion is getting good. Any more thoughts?
The biggest problem is most people just don't try. Casual class attendence is at least something. But serious practice has to go beyond organized class times.
EDIT: This forum is seriously malfunctioning. I'm logged in as myself (Punchy Von Gibbingcrantz) but my post is showing with someone else's name. I'm not Forrestman.
I work part time, go to school part time and am the mother of 2 teen age girls. I manage to make it to class 2 days a week to train, 2 days a week to assist others in training, and 1 day for Kumite/fighting(it's my favorite). It isnt an either/or. It's about how much time you are willing to take away from your other fun time activities. For me this is my recreation. If you think about the amount of time that you spend doing no-nonsese things like watching TV or playing video games and use that time for practise you can manage both Martial arts and Family.
I admit there are times I get very overwhelmed and think the only thing I do is work and Kajukenbo but then I remember what I get out of it. The discipline, self-defense, and focus.
Originally posted by mklop: I work part time, go to school part time and am the mother of 2 teen age girls. I manage to make it to class 2 days a week to train, 2 days a week to assist others in training, and 1 day for Kumite/fighting(it's my favorite). It isnt an either/or. It's about how much time you are willing to take away from your other fun time activities. For me this is my recreation. If you think about the amount of time that you spend doing no-nonsese things like watching TV or playing video games and use that time for practise you can manage both Martial arts and Family.
I admit there are times I get very overwhelmed and think the only thing I do is work and Kajukenbo but then I remember what I get out of it. The discipline, self-defense, and focus.
mklop, I have to applaud you for such a wonderful show of dedication not only to your art, but also to those things that truly matter. Indeed, I definitely will try to follow your example.
It kills me not to be able to be in an environment with other martial artists. I'm attending a tedious academy right now and swamped with homework most of the time. Money is also a problem, my middle class family simply can't afford it. All this still does not stop me though, I sparr on my bag in my room when I have the time. I love the show to. I wish I can travel the world experiencing other martial arts. (except the pain part lol).
This is a great question and one that I have pondered many times myself. It is nice to see those who are able to find the balance that we seek and I admire those of you who make the sacrifices and compromises that affect your training.
I do not yet have a family like some of you but in the near future (for my mother will eventually nag me for grandchildren), I know that I won't be able to spend as much time training as I do now. Even with my full time work, gym time and I decided to take some personal enrichment courses, I somehow manage to get regular training in. Of course, there are times where I would miss a week or a couple of days per week due to lack of sleep or other priorities.
I figure I can afford to work my hardest now and then later on, it will benefit me. The benefits include being healthy enough to start training again (that is if i ever need to stop) and/or I will be able to recall the techniques that i learn later on with not so much effort if i work hard now and drill everything in on a regular basis...so to speak.
The changing of ones lifestyle will inevitably lead to changing the way we train. As some of mentioned, sometimes you stop training or you can only train once a week. I think that as we get older and our priorities change, we will develop training routines to fit our lifestyle. If done correctly and efficiently, then we haven't lost anything because progress will happen. We look at things from a different point-of-view right now and I personally am used to training on a reg basis. When I have more responsibilities (added on to the ones I already have) I know that I won't be able to train as often as I do now.
Originally posted by Nightingale: It kills me not to be able to be in an environment with other martial artists. I'm attending a tedious academy right now and swamped with homework most of the time. Money is also a problem, my middle class family simply can't afford it. All this still does not stop me though, I sparr on my bag in my room when I have the time. I love the show to. I wish I can travel the world experiencing other martial arts. (except the pain part lol).
It's cool that you are keeping in shape by hitting the bag in your room. I don't have a bag in my room!
See what they have on campus and see what kind of instruction is available to you. It is the safest way to train. Of course, you can use vids as "guidance" and check out lit to keep your knowledge sharp but the best way is to do it for real. I understand that you have constraints in your life but your post tells us that you have good potential. You will find some way if that is your goal.
Originally posted by mklop: I work part time, go to school part time and am the mother of 2 teen age girls. I manage to make it to class 2 days a week to train, 2 days a week to assist others in training, and 1 day for Kumite/fighting(it's my favorite). It isnt an either/or. It's about how much time you are willing to take away from your other fun time activities. For me this is my recreation. If you think about the amount of time that you spend doing no-nonsese things like watching TV or playing video games and use that time for practise you can manage both Martial arts and Family.
I admit there are times I get very overwhelmed and think the only thing I do is work and Kajukenbo but then I remember what I get out of it. The discipline, self-defense, and focus.
Nice to meet another fellow Kaju player.
Seems like you've accomplished what a lot of people have trouble doing...finding a balance. With what you have on your shoulders, it is a wonder that you get to class...forget just going to class but you help out as well. I try to help out and with my schedule my teacher says that I can assist whenever I am available to do so. There are weeks where I cannot make it and it just makes me angry.
But as you know, priorities can change in an instant...although I can only imagine.
WOW! It's amazing to see just how dedicated and determined people are to squeeze in that time for fighting and family.
I'm 22 and just got out of college and started my job as a nurse . Unfortunatly, I have the graveyard shift, so most of my time during the day is spent sleeping(I'm not really a night person). I usually go to the gym to practice with my instructor on thursday's and sunday's, so I still manage to get alot of time to have fun.
When I'm not working or hangin' at the gym, I'm either partying with friends(It's crazy fun) or composing music. Or sometimes I babysit my cousins and nephew. My mom doesn't really like the fact that I'm still into fighting("You know how to defend yourself! Why don't you just quit? Then you can settle down and have kids.") that's her favorite thing to say. I mean, I love kids but it's just too early for me .
. Unfortunatly, I have the graveyard shift, so most of my time during the day is spent sleeping(I'm not really a night person). I usually go to the gym to practice with my instructor on thursday's and sunday's, so I still manage to get alot of time to have fun.
or composing music. Or sometimes I babysit my cousins and nephew. My mom doesn't really like the fact that I'm still into fighting("You know how to defend yourself! Why don't you just quit? Then you can settle down and have kids.") that's her favorite thing to say
. I mean, I love kids but it's just too early for me 
.
