Do you prefer money being spent on you above someone doing something nice for you for your birthday?
Well, this year has started out bad financially. My husband's birthday was on Tuesday. I ordered him Salsa Dancing DVD's on the internet for his birthday present. This might sound a little corny, but we are both a little overweight and have been talking about doing something we both like, to get a little exercise. I also know how much fun dancing can be and how it changed my life when I took up dance lessons a couple of years ago. He did mention that he would like to dance but don't want to look like a fool in front of other people. So I thought it would be a good present, since it could also bring some spark into our relationship.
Unfortunately, his present did not arrive on time, so I tried to make his B-Day as special as I could. I gave him breakfast in bed, not just any breakfast, one that you'll get in a 5 star hotel.
I cleaned the house and made sure it was spotless while he was at work. I then made him a 5 star dinner. I set the table with candles and everything as you would for a formal romantic dinner. I played light classical music in the background and made little notes, from where he would enter in by the door, almost like a treasure hunt.
For his first clue he was led to the first hiding spot, where he found a little B-Day Coupon Booklet, that I made for him. Every coupon inside the booklet has something special I can do for him, like giving him a 30min footrub or a 1hr massage, anything that will make him feel happy and relaxed.
The second clue led him to a page in my journal I wrote a while ago about how greatful I am for him in my life and all the good qualities I see in him.
The third clue led him to the dining room table where we had a beautiful dinner. Then, I gave him a clue to what the present was that I ordered for him by leading him to the computer where I had the website on from where I ordered the present. Lukily he was very excited about the gift.
When he came back from the computer to the dining room, his dessert was waiting for him. After dessert I gave him a note asking him to take a shower and wait on the bed. While he was in the shower I decorated the room with candles and played light classical music.
After the shower, I gave him a nice long massage.
It was the best birthday, he said, he had ever had and that he prefered being alone with me above going out.
I enjoyed doing those things for him, because it made me feel that I was showing him how much I love him, by doing something special for him. It also showed me that I can do something creative and romantic if I really wanted to.
I too really like creativity or special treatment for my special days. One thing that has happened to me over time is that now that I am very much established in my career and have no financial worries - I really don't like people buying things for me for gifts. I feel guilty whem my parents buy me stuff or my wife feels compelled to make sure she has plenty of wrapped stuff under the tree for me.
What you did for your hubby would score a perfect 10 in my book. Actually my wife made me a coupon book a few years back and surprised me with that. It was a giant success and now I ask her for that every year.
My wife on the other hand doesn't like the coupon book idea for a gift for her - probably because I pamper the heck out of her already and she doesn't need a coupon for special treatment. She still likes to be taken out to eat on her day and she does like to have something purchased for her. However she doesn't like me to surprise her with gifts - she would rather pick out something herself and buy it together. This works for me!
It kind of feels like I was looking for it, but I just really actually felt like the romance in most relationships, lack. As for Nannzie, I am glad to hear that you pamper your wife. That is what I feel is the most important thing in a relationship.
Sometimes it is too easy for people to just buy gifts to say you're special, or thank you, or miss you, because it is easier. When actually being in service of that person, doing things for them that require effort on your part, is what counts the most. And that counts for everyday things, not just birthdays or special occations.
I just want people to know, especially for women who most often wait for men to be romantic, that they, as I realised for myself, need to bring romance into their relationships.
To do extra special things for the people you love, because, those moments are unforgetable.
