I have being seeing my boyfriend for over a year now, and I can't imagine my life without him. He's everything I have looked for. We have excellent communication (except for this obviously), he's supportive, energetic, fun, successful, driven...I could go on forever. However, there is one HUGE issue. For some reason my body seems to react negitivly to his. I DO have a sexual drive, but it seems to disappear everytime there is the possibility of having sex with him. I have had other relationships where the sex was great. This has never been an issue before.
He has been so incredibly patient with this situation, but it's getting to be too much to handle...and we often argue about this, but only this. I am willing to do anything to figure this out. I want to marry him, but I would never expect him to marry me if I don't want to have sex.
I don't know if it's a lack of life experience (I'm 24), or just a simple lack of physical chemical reaction between the two of us. Please Help! Thank you!
You have something mentally that is making you "shut down" when you are in the position to have relations. There is no chemical reaction or something physical since you do have a good lobito - it just goes away at the moment of truth which is caused from a mental issue.
My guess is that you really believe this is the man you want to marry and you are afraid of disappointing him in the sack. You even said in your note that you know he will never pop the question if he knows there is a problem in bed so this is certainly something that is stuck in your subconscience.
My advise to you is to not get too worried about whether this is the future husband or not. You have to be yourself and just let things work out how they need to work out. So don't worry about failure - just be yourself and if things work out with this guy then great, if not then there will be plenty of other guys down the line.
